It is not essential for the world to move the way you think. Your thoughts need not match the way the things are and vice versa. Many of you must have experienced the moments of crying in the bathroom and looking at the mirror and telling that you are broken.
I was not depressed for a long time and anxiety had left me for good. I had a feeling of discontent and I felt lack of enthusiasm and energy in me.
I lost my motivation and was turning down on my focus. I felt the pangs of negativity take over me and negative thoughts drowned me into an ocean of uncertainty at the thought of me being criticized.
I was frustrated atr the thought that there was no one to love me or care for me when I needed the most.
All the bathroom crying did not give me any insight. But the world sent me guidance through alternate ways.
A guy named Richard Wilkins posted a video in my group, and it was titled as ‘’My F-k it Jeans’’
In his 60s, Richards was making us realize, how age has not taken over him and his ambitions. It has not impacted his feelings, eating, dressing, and enjoyment of life. He doesn’t give a damn about the society or their views about his age and behavior. He loves to live true to his life and the way he wants to live, and he has never been much happier. And look at me, I am in my thirties and feel broken and destroyed and wiped out as though it is the end of the world.
Finally one fine day I drove a Saturday morning to Richard in Northampton, to his Recharge Day.
He often says that the reason you are there is not the reason you are there. He told me that I was not broken at all. And do I dare to believe that statement of Richard’s. I was there with at least 200 more people in that room. And it was possible that a few of them must have felt broken. I wondered if I was only an exception among the broken ones.
After a few days I arrived at his place for a five day Broadband Consciousness course with him and his partner Liz and seven other strangers, who are now my friendsThe next five days I experienced things that I had never felt before.
I was a good listener. I didn’t look at my phone. I supported others in their struggles and they supported me. I woke up early and full of energy. I felt light as a feather. I never felt like being hard anymore. I learnt to shut off the negative voice in my ear. I discovered myself again. I learned that the script is just thoughts from incorrect beliefs and that they were all false. If I do not select my thoughts, my action, my feelings, and my experiences then the script will choose for me.